The OCD Success Story with Sam Temple
Sam Temple is a beloved member of the H3 podcast, which has over 2.89M subscribers and gained over 1.3b views. As the prop master and crew member, she gained a loyal fan following of her own with 112k+ Instagram followers
Since she was a girl, Sam Temple has lived with obsessive-compulsive disorder—intrusive thoughts that hijacked her mind and drove her to strange behaviors that would give her a little relief from her fears. She had a perfectionist’s fear of disappointing people. She was terrified of guns and other weapons, which would trigger images of harm coming to herself or others.
And those were only a few of the thoughts that possessed her. It took more than a decade for her to find the treatment that makes life with OCD manageable. She has been speaking out now about the disorder and her treatment to let others with OCD know they aren’t alone, and that they can get help. Most recently she shared her story on the Rooted Recovery Stories Podcast which quickly became one of the most viewed episodes.
01:20 Introducing Sam Temple: A Journey with OCD
01:52 Sam's Early Struggles and Diagnosis
03:10 Finding Help with NOCD
09:23 Living with Health Anxiety
18:11 The Impact of OCD on Daily Life
23:42 Supportive Partners and OCD
27:15 Challenges and Misconceptions
29:24 Living with OCD: Real-Life Examples
31:06 The Importance of Specialized Treatment
35:28 Finding Comfort in Relaxation
39:35 Impact on Relationships
40:51 Overcoming Fears and Living Fully
43:19 Encouragement and Final Thoughts
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The OCD Success Story with Sam Temple
[00:00:00] Erin H. Davis: We're partnering with NoCD to raise awareness about OCD. OCD is more than what you see on TV and in the movies. Imagine having unwanted thoughts about your relationship stuck in your head all day, no matter how hard you try to make them go away. That's Relationship OCD. It comes with unrelenting, intrusive images, thoughts, and urges about your partner or loved one.
[00:00:24] Erin H. Davis: Breaking the OCD cycle takes effective treatment. Go to nocd. com
[00:00:34] Sam Temple: I was in denial for a very long time, like after I was diagnosed and I kept trying to poke holes in that diagnosis and being like, no, you know, I don't think I have, I think they were wrong. I think you need to get a second opinion because it was just, I didn't really, Understand OCD at that point.
[00:00:53] Erin H. Davis: Hi, I'm Erin, licensed clinical mental health counselor and OCD specialist.
[00:00:59] Erin H. Davis: I'm also a wife, mom to three and small business owner helping those who are spiraling from intrusive thoughts to come out of that valley with long term recovery and self awareness. Reheat your coffee and pop in your AirPods to learn how to boss up to OCD.
[00:01:20] Erin H. Davis: All right. I have a very special guest in today's episode. I'm very excited to bring this guest and her story to you all. So today I'm going to be talking with Sam Temple, who is a beloved member of the H3 podcast on YouTube, which has over 2. 89 million subscribers and has gained over 1. 3 billion views.
[00:01:44] Erin H. Davis: As the prop master and crew member, she's gained a loyal fan following of her own 112, 000 Instagram followers. Since she was a girl, Sam Temple has lived with obsessive compulsive disorder, intrusive thoughts that hijacked her mind and drove her to strange behaviors that would give her a little relief from the world.
[00:02:03] Erin H. Davis: from her fears. She had a perfectionist fear of disappointing people. She was terrified of guns and other weapons which would trigger images of harming coming to herself or others. And those were only a few of the thoughts that possessed her. It took more than a decade for her to find the treatment that makes life with OCD manageable.
[00:02:24] Erin H. Davis: She has been speaking out now about the disorder and her treatment to let others with OCD know that [00:02:30] they are not alone. And that you can get help too. Most recently, she shared her story on the Rooted Recovery Stories podcast, which quickly became one of the most viewed episodes. So please join me in this conversation with Sam.
[00:02:47] Erin H. Davis: Well, thank you, Sam, for speaking with me today. I'm so excited for my listeners to hear your story and all the things you're doing. So welcome, welcome. And Yeah. Again, I just really appreciate your time and efforts and contributing to the OCD community. Thank you
so
[00:03:05] Sam Temple: much for having me. I mean, it's really, really awesome to get to talk to you.
[00:03:09] Erin H. Davis: Yes. So you have been doing a lot of advocacy for OCD and it's really taken off, especially with the NoCD company. How did you get started with NoCD?
[00:03:25] Sam Temple: So, I got started with no CD when I was having what I thought was extreme anxiety and I went to my psychiatrist who kind of did an evaluation. She was like, um, I think that you might have OCD.
[00:03:40] Sam Temple: And I was like, no, I don't, I don't wash my hands all the time. I'm not a tidy person, you know, because in my mind, OCD is kind of like one type of way at this point. So she actually in this, in my psychiatrist was with my insurance. So she referred me out to no CD, who my insurance also accepted, which was awesome.
[00:04:02] Sam Temple: So then after my first session. They were like, yep, basically, like they were able to, I had textbook OCD. Like they were able to diagnose me very quickly.
[00:04:15] Erin H. Davis: Right. Well, and that's probably the benefit of seeing a specialist and then especially going with no CD because that's their bread and butter. That's what they see all the time.
[00:04:24] Erin H. Davis: So did that feel Validating to go to a therapist because I'm sure that's still scary. I mean, no matter where you are in your journey.
[00:04:34] Sam Temple: Oh, yeah, it was very scary. Especially when someone is telling you that you have something that you only know, you know, very little about and I was having, like, health anxiety.
[00:04:45] Sam Temple: So someone telling me, like, you have a disorder. I was like, no, no, I don't. I was in denial for a very long time. Like after I was diagnosed and I kept trying to poke holes in that diagnosis and being like, no, you know, I don't think I have, I think they [00:05:00] were wrong. I think you need to get a second opinion because it was just, I didn't really understand OCD at that point.
[00:05:07] Sam Temple: So trying to get to know myself again, Knowing what OCD is and how it's impacted my whole life is very, it's a journey and it's very fascinating.
[00:05:20] Erin H. Davis: So true. Yeah. And what was life like for you before you found OCD or before you got treatment? So
[00:05:28] Sam Temple: before I was just struggling with this extreme, like crushing, existential anxiety and health anxiety and just finding myself being a lot more obsessive over certain things than most people.
[00:05:44] Sam Temple: Like I would constantly be convincing myself that I had some kind of illness or some kind of disease or. nerve damage or lungs. My lungs were collapsing or I had a brain aneurysm. It was always, it was something every day. It was something new. And I would just kind of notice how my brain would work around these obsessions.
[00:06:05] Sam Temple: Like I would be really obsessed with something for a while. Then it would switch to something else. And it could last like six months and then I'd be obsessed with something else that lasts two weeks. And I was like, why am I always cycling on something? So just, I was really just noticing like the patterns in my brain and noticing that they were distressing me.
[00:06:29] Erin H. Davis: So true. Yeah. And OCD can be a shapeshifter like that. And the health anxiety is a very challenging theme to, Experience because like a brain aneurysm, you can't see, and then it's like, Oh, it's too late. Yeah. Yeah.
[00:06:48] Sam Temple: Yeah. It was anything, especially the things that I couldn't see, right? Like a brain aneurysm and my heart rate being too high.
[00:06:54] Sam Temple: That's kind of, that's kind of what started everything. But it was just like, it was never like a skin irritation. It was never something that I could see and verify myself.
[00:07:05] Erin H. Davis: It
[00:07:05] Sam Temple: was always something inside. It was, so my brain was just sort of really latching on to any sort of uncertainty, like things that I could not right away confirm, because if I could confirm something right away, I would be like, okay, I have control over that thing.
[00:07:22] Sam Temple: But if I didn't, then it was just whole separate situation.
[00:07:27] Erin H. Davis: Exactly. Exactly. Exactly. Exactly. So. [00:07:30] Once you were getting treatment, what did you notice as far as your changes throughout like the treatment progress?
[00:07:39] Sam Temple: So the beginning of treatment is hard. Starting ERP is something, especially I had never done ERP before, so trying to get acclimated to this new modality where you're literally being exposed to the things that are freaking you out.
[00:07:54] Sam Temple: It's very difficult at the beginning, but you see it in my experience, I saw it work very quickly. So I was able to believe in the process very, very quickly, and it's only been up from there, but in the beginning, I started working on so with no CD and doing ERP in general, you have sort of like a hierarchy.
[00:08:16] Sam Temple: Right. Of your thoughts. So you would start with the lower, like things lower on your hierarchy and work up to the things that are like very distressing. So chipping away little by little, I was able to just sort of establish trust in like, Oh, this is actually really working for me because after I would say two or three weeks of being with no CD.
[00:08:44] Sam Temple: I was like, Oh yeah, those things that were low on my hierarchy. I don't even like think about those things anymore.
[00:08:50] Erin H. Davis: That's awesome.
[00:08:51] Sam Temple: And it was just, you know, the intrusive thoughts no longer were distressing me as much as they were.
[00:09:01] Erin H. Davis: Yes, that's awesome. So it's like, you were able to see that you were doing things more so now than you could beforehand.
[00:09:09] Erin H. Davis: And what were like some of those big things? I don't know, just those big waves of like the aha, like this is working, like I can feel it and I know I'm gaining momentum. Like what were those moments like and when were they? So
[00:09:23] Sam Temple: I sort of just noticed I had a physical compulsion where I would check my pulse constantly.
[00:09:28] Sam Temple: So I would always be doing this or always be doing this, like just trying to get a gauge of my pulse. And that was kind of the first thing when I noticed, I was like, I'm not doing that as much. Excellent. And so it was just, I, I got really good at delaying that compulsion. And also one of my exposures was my heart may or may not race.
[00:09:55] Sam Temple: So I would have to just tell myself like, it may race, it may not race, it [00:10:00] may be given a reason to race. It may not be given a reason to race. So I'm noticing that my compulsion was lower, was kind of the first time where I was like, Maybe this is working, right? I don't really do that compulsion that much anymore just because my heart may or may not race and that's fine.
[00:10:20] Sam Temple: I have to be okay with the uncertainty of that,
[00:10:23] Erin H. Davis: right? Yeah. And that in therapy, that's what I talk about with my clients. So often, like, we're not just doing exposures, like, for the fun of it is to help you. Change that relationship with the uncertainty, and that's really challenging for a lot of people.
[00:10:39] Erin H. Davis: And so you are noticing, like, this mantra of my heart may or may not race, and it may or may not have a reason to race and, like, it is what it is.
[00:10:50] Sam Temple: Yeah. Yeah. I mean, trying to, that's, that's a very difficult thing about OCD in general is getting to a point where you have to just be comfortable with that uncertainty.
[00:11:01] Sam Temple: It's extremely hard because OCD does not like uncertainty. OCD wants to know for sure. And if, when you can't know for sure, it's extremely, extremely distressing.
[00:11:13] Erin H. Davis: Right. So considering how challenging OCD is and how much you're pushing outside of your comfort zone, what was that experience like in having a support person there with you, especially an experienced OCD therapist from NoCD?
[00:11:31] Sam Temple: So prior to NoCD, I had never been with someone specialized in OCD, and I didn't even think that. Someone like such a thing existed, like someone who was just very dedicated to only OCD. I had been in talk therapy forever wondering why am I not getting better? If everyone's telling me I'm just having anxiety and all it is is anxiety.
[00:11:54] Sam Temple: Why am I not getting better? Because that's what I was dealing with for so long was everyone just saying, Oh, you just have really bad anxiety. This is not just really bad anxiety. This is, this is disordered thinking. Only finding it was. It was huge. It was honestly the first time that I had felt hope in years when I found no CD because I was just like, Oh my God, there is something specialized for this.
[00:12:24] Sam Temple: I hope that it works for me, and it has
[00:12:26] Erin H. Davis: right, and I can understand where it [00:12:30] is just kind of a life changing moment in a way. When you get a diagnosis that comes with a tail end of disorder and you're thinking, oh, my gosh, what next? And so did you did you have a lot of trust in the no CD framework and their approach and the therapist that you got?
[00:12:52] Sam Temple: I did. Yeah. And, and I love my therapist. She is so fantastic, but you have to just kind of do the process for a bit and learn how it works and be open to it. And just really, it starts working so quickly that you establish trust very quickly in the process.
[00:13:14] Erin H. Davis: That's awesome. That's awesome. Yeah. Because a lot of times I mean, people struggle with OCD on average 14 to 17 years.
[00:13:24] Erin H. Davis: And how old were you whenever you first started your OCD specialized treatment?
[00:13:30] Sam Temple: So I have been experiencing symptoms of OCD since I was a kid, and I only know that sort of in retrospect. I'm going through this therapy and I'm looking at my whole life and I'm like, Oh yeah, that's OCD. That's OCD. That's OCD.
[00:13:49] Sam Temple: But I, I was not formally diagnosed until I was 21 or 22.
[00:13:55] Erin H. Davis: Okay. Okay. Yeah. And what for those people out there who are sitting on the fence, they recognize they have. OCD, but they haven't sought that specialized treatment because they're afraid or whatever's going on. What advice do you have for them to kind of help them seek out the treatment and get the help that they need?
[00:14:21] Sam Temple: I would say, start by trying no CD. Even if you don't think you have OCD, no CD can help you to figure that out. And it's, I mean, I can just say from my experience, I'm so happy that I decided to try NoCD and it has worked for me. I mean, the reward has been amazing. It has changed my life entirely. So that I can't stress enough how much I didn't think that I could be helped.
[00:14:54] Sam Temple: That was a huge, huge hurdle that I had was constantly [00:15:00] telling myself, like, you're, you're the worst case. You are beyond help. You can't, you're never going to get better. And the change that I've seen in my life after starting no CD is just monumental. So I just can't stress enough that you're not beyond help and take the first step.
[00:15:22] Erin H. Davis: That's awesome. I love to hear that. And you're not alone in feeling that way. I mean, so many people, they come to a consultation or they're sending me an email and they're saying like, I feel so far gone. Yeah, that's I always
[00:15:39] Sam Temple: would tell myself that that was an intrusive thought that I had. I would just say you can't be helped.
[00:15:44] Sam Temple: This is your life. Like there's how is somebody gonna rewire my brain, but it's it's weird and it's Amazing and it's crazy how ERP can do that. Like there are like this modality of therapy can literally Change the way you think it's, it's
[00:16:02] Erin H. Davis: yes,
[00:16:02] Sam Temple: mind blowing.
[00:16:03] Erin H. Davis: Yes. And it, and like you were saying earlier, the results can come pretty quickly.
[00:16:09] Sam Temple: Yes. Yeah. Yeah. For me, it was a few weeks to a month where I was seeing sort of my lower hierarchy things just caused me less and less to stress, which. That just chipping away at that a little bit even was just so helpful.
[00:16:25] Erin H. Davis: Yeah. And I love how you phrased it. Like when you're feeling like you're so far gone or nobody can help you, like those sorts of thoughts, those are intrusive thoughts.
[00:16:37] Sam Temple: Yeah. Yeah. A hundred percent. And I didn't realize it was intrusive until I learned more about. My OCD, and I'm like, oh, I don't actually have to believe that that's just like something that's coming in my mind that I don't necessarily have to give any value to so learning what intrusive thoughts were, because I didn't even know what intrusive thoughts were prior to my OCD diagnosis.
[00:17:01] Sam Temple: So learning that I, that not every thought equates a feeling that I'm having. Was like, wait, really? Because you think it's coming from me. It must be me. It's in my head It must be what I believe and it's like no, you know, no, that's not true
[00:17:20] Erin H. Davis: Right, right, and it's also I mean, I don't know if it's comforting for you But it feels comforting for most [00:17:30] like was there a point in time where you realize that?
[00:17:35] Erin H. Davis: Everyone experiences intrusive thoughts You
[00:17:38] Sam Temple: Right. Yeah. And, and I definitely, yes, I realized that everyone does experience these things, but the difference with OCD is the level, the level of frequency and distress that they bring.
[00:17:52] Erin H. Davis: Exactly. Someone
[00:17:53] Sam Temple: may be with more normal, generalized anxiety, may have intrusive thoughts that affect them a certain way with OCD.
[00:18:00] Sam Temple: It's like, I can't stop thinking about that one thing and it gets me to the edge of a panic attack every single time I think about it,
[00:18:08] Erin H. Davis: right? So true. Yeah. And so with the health anxiety, considering how challenging that is. I mean, it sounds like you floated between all sorts of health conditions. Did you find yourself going to the doctor a lot?
[00:18:26] Sam Temple: Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. I should have a punch card at that time. I was like, I need like a membership based doctor's office. Frequent flyer. I mean, I would, and yeah, and I would go and I would just be like, can I please get an EKG? I would walk in there fine. Normal, everything, normal vitals, blood, everything. And I'd be like, okay, can I get an MRI?
[00:18:52] Sam Temple: And they're like, you, you, you know, obviously your doctor isn't going to do that unless they see a need for you to do that. So there was a lot of, um, going, going to this doctor. And if they didn't give me what I wanted, I wouldn't go to a different doctor. And it was just constantly trying to prove to myself that something was wrong.
[00:19:12] Sam Temple: And nothing was wrong,
[00:19:14] Erin H. Davis: right? Oh, okay. I'm sure that can feel invalidating Sam when you're going to the doctor and they're not finding anything. So did you go through that kind of doctor shopping and getting second opinions for months, years? What was that timeframe like?
[00:19:32] Sam Temple: Years. I mean, that's sort of just how I approached going to the doctor by default for years.
[00:19:39] Sam Temple: Like I would be so convinced that I had a brain aneurysm. For example, this was a whole thing that I went through where I would go just get blood work done. And when that was normal, I would be, I would go to my doctor and I'd be like, I just feel like there's something wrong. And they're like, well, There's not, we don't know what to tell you.
[00:19:59] Sam Temple: [00:20:00] And so then I would go to a different doctor and I would just be like, can I just, I just want to, I need an MRI. I need a cat scan. I need something. I need to make sure I don't have a brain aneurysm. And they would look at me like I'm crazy because they're like, you don't. You don't you're that this is not what you're going through.
[00:20:15] Sam Temple: You have 0 symptoms of this. So, I mean, like, a collapsed lung, for example, was 1 thing that I was, like, petrified of for so long. And it's like, I'm breathing fine. I obviously have no, I have no symptoms of this happening, but I would just go from doctor to doctor to doctor. And I would ask for all of these tests that I had no reason to get.
[00:20:35] Sam Temple: And it wasn't validating because I was so convinced in my mind that there was something wrong and everyone was telling me there wasn't something wrong and genuinely there wasn't, but my brain was trying so hard to make sense of. Uncertainty. It was trying to just find something tangible to cling to. It was really going hand in hand with my mental health in general, because I started doing things like working out became a compulsion of mine.
[00:21:08] Sam Temple: Calorie counting became a compulsion of mine. I was doing all of these things because I was like, these things will make me feel better. If I do this routine every day in a perfect sequence. This is what is going to cure my mental health. My anxiety will go away if I work out for, uh, whatever the recommended 30 minutes a day, how they always say, Oh, this the amount of exercise is equal to a dose of antidepressant or whatever.
[00:21:38] Sam Temple: They, they say that. I would go and work out for exactly that amount of time. I would eat like the best brain diet. Like I would just be doing supplements. Oh my gosh. I got so obsessed with supplements. I was doing like supplement regimens every day for the longest time. I was like, why is this not making me perfect?
[00:21:58] Sam Temple: Why is this not making me better? But all of this, the, the health between going to the doctor and trying to like live exactly right, just became very like compulsory.
[00:22:10] Erin H. Davis: Yes, I'm sure. And it was, it sounds like such a day to day cycle. Like you had to do these things to stay safe or to have some level of certainty and guarantee.
[00:22:23] Erin H. Davis: Yeah, exactly. I'm sure that was tough. And I'm just curious, like, in any point of [00:22:30] going to the doctor, was there a time when they were like, Oh, we did see something on those test results?
[00:22:36] Sam Temple: Yes. I, I always say like, coincidence is the like enemy of OCD. It is. It is. Oh, I hate, I hate when things just happen to happen sometimes.
[00:22:51] Sam Temple: So yeah, like I, I, at one point I had a little bit of anemia and that wasn't even on my health anxiety radar. So I just a little iron deficient and it wasn't even that bad. I just had to take like an iron supplement. But my brain was like, you will die because of that.
[00:23:11] Erin H. Davis: Sure.
[00:23:12] Sam Temple: Because of that anemia that you have.
[00:23:15] Sam Temple: So I changed my diet. I was eating like all high iron foods. And I was like, I have to eat this diet every day because I'm anemic. If I don't do this, my anemia is going to get worse and I will die. So it just, even if you just get a little crumb of something from the doctor, my brain would just run with that.
[00:23:41] Erin H. Davis: Of course. Yeah. And did you notice if any of your loved ones, like a boyfriend or parents or other family members, did they accidentally accommodate your OCD?
[00:23:54] Sam Temple: Yes. My partner is. Amazing with my OCD, like I am so lucky to have someone so patient and just understanding and good at talking me through some of these things.
[00:24:11] Sam Temple: And he's just very, he's very good at helping me realize when I'm having mental distortions or cognitive distortions. And he'll be like, you're thinking about this and this type of way, and it's not really helpful to you. You need to stop Googling all of your symptoms. You need to, that's like an awful thing that I used to do constantly.
[00:24:34] Sam Temple: So he's very good at sort of calling out my behaviors or noticing when I'm having a compulsion, he would notice whenever I was checking and he would just say, Hey, I noticed that you're having, you're doing a compulsion right now. How are you feeling? Like, is everything okay? So having someone so patient was just monumental in my, in my journey also.
[00:24:58] Erin H. Davis: We're partnering with [00:25:00] NoCD to raise awareness about OCD. OCD is more than what you see on TV and in the movies. Imagine having unwanted thoughts about your relationship stuck in your head all day, no matter how hard you try to make them go away. That's Relationship OCD. It comes with unrelenting, intrusive images, thoughts, and urges about your partner or loved one.
[00:25:22] Erin H. Davis: If you think you may be struggling with Relationship OCD, there's hope. NoCD offers effective, affordable, and convenient OCD therapy. NoCD therapists are trained in exposure response prevention therapy, the gold standard treatment for OCD. With NoCD, you can do virtual, live, face to face video sessions with one of their licensed specialty trained therapists.
[00:25:45] Erin H. Davis: It's affordable, and they accept most major insurance plans. Breaking the relationship OCD cycle takes effective treatment. To get started with NoCD, go to nocd. com slash savage. Right. Yeah. So having a supportive partner who can help you in recognizing what's a compulsion or when you're kind of in this obsessional doubt or distorted thinking.
[00:26:11] Erin H. Davis: But what about like, before getting your OCD treatment, were people accidentally reinforcing or feeding into the OCD? Yeah.
[00:26:21] Sam Temple: Yeah. So my mom and my grandmother also have OCD and they, yeah. So they are, uh, they're not currently in therapy. They're not currently doing treatment right now. So when I was a child, my mom had really bad health anxiety herself.
[00:26:39] Sam Temple: And sort of, I would hear her talk about these things and then I would start worrying about them. And so it was just kind of a cycle that was. You know, between her and I, where we were kind of feeding each other's health anxiety, which we learned later is so, so, but a lot of people were very invalidating to me because I would always just be told.
[00:27:08] Sam Temple: You just have really bad anxiety. It's just anxiety. Go outside, put your phone down, you know? Right. No, I don't think any amount of going outside and putting your phone down is going to cure OCD. It may help you a little bit with generalized anxiety, but it's not going to cure a disorder. So I had a [00:27:30] lot of just very.
[00:27:31] Sam Temple: Invalidating dialogue and just people offering or telling me to do things that I, that weren't helping me, which was very invalidating because I was like, why does this work for everyone else, but not me?
[00:27:46] Erin H. Davis: Sure. Yeah. It seems like people always get this advice of, well, don't think about it anymore. And it's like, oh, wow.
[00:27:53] Erin H. Davis: Thank you. Captain obvious. Oh, I could have thought that.
[00:27:56] Sam Temple: Yeah, I got, I got a lot of that as well. Just, just stop thinking about it. That's like the worst thing to tell somebody with OCD. It's like, no, the issue is I'm trying to stop thinking about it. And I can, that's something that I would always explain to people.
[00:28:15] Sam Temple: I would say, I know it's not logical. I know it's irrational, but knowing that doesn't take the thought away. So that was sort of how I would try to vocalize that to people who just don't understand.
[00:28:29] Erin H. Davis: Yes. And so are you still working with your OCD therapist?
[00:28:35] Sam Temple: Yes. Yes.
[00:28:36] Erin H. Davis: Okay.
[00:28:37] Sam Temple: I see her twice a week.
[00:28:38] Erin H. Davis: Oh, okay.
[00:28:39] Erin H. Davis: That's great. Yes. So what do you do now, Sam, when it comes to kind of any sickness or health, you know, ailment? How do you know the difference between your health anxiety and maybe a legitimate thing that you need to see the doctor for?
[00:28:59] Sam Temple: Right. Since I've been doing ERP with no CD, I have gotten tremendously better about this.
[00:29:07] Sam Temple: And I don't really, I don't really self diagnose much at all anymore. It's sort of something that has taken, that I've been able to take down several notches. The volume is so low on those thoughts that they're not distressing me as much as they were. When I have anything health related now, I had to have my wisdom teeth taken out recently.
[00:29:29] Erin H. Davis: Okay.
[00:29:29] Sam Temple: And I'm having like all kinds of, I'm having complications from it. And prior to no CD, I think I would have been freaking out and I'd be panicking Googling. I'd probably be calling my doctor every single day. But with this, I called my doctor once for a follow up. She gave me advice, I'm taking her advice, and it's fine.
[00:29:54] Sam Temple: I'm not worried about it every day. Because it's just like, you know, [00:30:00] I there's in, in life, there's a chance of everything. And if I live my life in fear of chance, then I don't really live at all. I love that. So it's just, there's always a chance of something negative happening and I have to just accept it.
[00:30:20] Erin H. Davis: Right. Right. And I mean, it sounds like this therapy has been really helpful for you. And I imagine that's very freeing to be in this place.
[00:30:31] Sam Temple: Oh, yeah, it's, it's weird. It's like I, uh, feeling good feels so good and I'm not used to, I'm, I'm like new to feeling good. So I'm like, oh wow, this is like, this is what like my full potential feels like.
[00:30:49] Sam Temple: Like I'm really stepping into myself and meeting myself again in sort of a new, uh, Just a new light and it just feels really, really good to be on the other side of some of these things that used to bother me so bad.
[00:31:04] Erin H. Davis: Right. Yeah. And did you have any concerns whenever you first started your OCD treatment?
[00:31:13] Erin H. Davis: Like, were you worried about how intense ERP might get?
[00:31:20] Sam Temple: Oh yeah. Yeah. I, yes, in the beginning. Even working with some of my lower hierarchy exposures, I would still get sort of panicky. Like after my treatment, I would just kind of sit there and be like, Oh, that didn't feel good. It didn't feel good to think about those things, but it doesn't.
[00:31:42] Sam Temple: And it's not meant to feel good. If an exposure doesn't feel good, it means that it's working over time. It's going to feel okay. You just have to expose yourself to it many times. So, yeah, in the beginning it was, it was uncomfortable and I was like, I don't know if this is going to work, but it just takes practice and commitment.
[00:32:07] Erin H. Davis: And did you feel like your therapist had? The training and the tools and the strategies you needed.
[00:32:15] Sam Temple: Oh, a hundred percent. A hundred percent. It's she is fantastic. And it's just so nice. I'm so happy that there is something specialized out there. I mean, she, she is [00:32:30] fabulous. She's fabulous.
[00:32:32] Erin H. Davis: Yes. Well, and. Sam, in all the, you know, podcasts you're doing and the YouTube stuff, and then I was reading an article about you on the NoCD website.
[00:32:46] Erin H. Davis: What is it that you're hoping to accomplish in sharing your story?
[00:32:52] Sam Temple: I was inspired to share my story after hearing others share their story and other people talking about this is what gave me the strength to get help. So if I can inspire even one person to get help from sharing my story, then I feel accomplished.
[00:33:09] Sam Temple: And so I, I want to talk to everyone. I love being an advocate. I love getting everyone to a point where they feel strong enough to take that first step and get help. And that, that would mean the world to me if people would take the first step.
[00:33:25] Erin H. Davis: Right. Yeah. So you've been very open in your experience and hoping to get others the help they need, because it is.
[00:33:34] Erin H. Davis: It is one of the more common mental health disorders in the U. S. and it's, there is specialized treatment for it. And we all seem to go through the misconceptions like you were saying earlier of like all OCD is about being tidy or hand washing and it's not that at all.
[00:33:54] Sam Temple: No. Yeah. There is, there is so many different subtypes of OCD.
[00:33:59] Sam Temple: And the ones that are really, uh, publicized would be like contamination OCD or washing your hands constantly or counting, or maybe a little bit of like superstition OCD. Like, that's something I used to deal with. Like, if this, if I, it's kind of like the step on the crack, you'll break your grandma's back type thing.
[00:34:22] Sam Temple: But yeah, I would be like, if a plane flies over my head right now, I'm going to die today. If the next car that goes by is white, that was a huge one when I was a kid. I would always do this. Like if the next car that goes by is this color, my mom's going to die. Two completely unrelated events, but I was trying to make sense of one uncertainty by trying to find something tangible with another.
[00:34:49] Sam Temple: Yeah, so it was just this, you know, constant, constant loops, but there's, yeah, there's so many different subtypes of OCD. It's not just contamination,
[00:34:58] Erin H. Davis: right? And [00:35:00] there's also, besides the obsessions and the intrusive thoughts, there's all kinds of compulsions. So in your previous interviews, I was listening to how you dove yourself into work.
[00:35:15] Erin H. Davis: So prior to getting your OCD treatment, was that one of your compulsions or was that like your escape?
[00:35:22] Sam Temple: Yes. Yeah. I, I constantly had to be doing something. And I think that Ultimately, I was just trying to distract myself from a thought from occurring, but now doing ERP and sort of working through my treatment, I'm able to sort of, it's not just about distraction anymore.
[00:35:49] Sam Temple: I actually am very like anti saying distraction. What's more powerful than distraction is being okay with the moment you're in. And I don't think the ultimate goal in treatment should be how to distract yourself really well. I think it should be how can I be okay in this moment?
[00:36:08] Erin H. Davis: Beautiful. Yeah, because the distractions aren't helping you resolve that relationship with uncertainty.
[00:36:17] Sam Temple: Right. It's just sort of a Band Aid. It's just, you know, and, and, and with working, I'm trying to change my relationship with work where I no longer see this as a distraction. I'm building towards something that is fulfilling. This makes me feel good and I deserve to rest. I'm trying to enjoy relaxing.
[00:36:41] Sam Temple: Without being like, oh, no, if I relax, I'm going to start cycling my thoughts and I'm, my OCD is really going to get triggered if I start relaxing. So I'm trying to be comfortable in the moment with relaxing also, which is very difficult as someone who uses work as a coping mechanism.
[00:37:01] Erin H. Davis: That is so true. And I mean, in our society, we are very busy humans and so many people will say, Oh, I have to keep myself busy so I don't get stuck in my thoughts.
[00:37:16] Erin H. Davis: Right,
[00:37:16] Sam Temple: right. That shouldn't be the goal. We all, we need to be comfortable with the moment.
[00:37:21] Erin H. Davis: Yes. I love that. And like, it sounds like your new goal is to find comfort and being [00:37:30] content with relaxing.
[00:37:33] Sam Temple: Yes. Yeah. Yeah. That's difficult. I am, I, I am a workaholic, so it is, it is really difficult to be like that.
[00:37:42] Sam Temple: I'm going to sit down right now and I'm going to watch a show on TV and I'm not going to think about anything else. And I'm just now sort of getting to a point where I'm able to do that uninterrupted by my brain. But prior to doing treatment, no shot, no shot.
[00:38:02] Erin H. Davis: Yeah. I mean, I can totally see, and I see it all the time in my clients, how OCD really impacts your quality of life.
[00:38:13] Sam Temple: Oh, 100%. I mean, it really, truly impacts everything in places that you don't even, uh, realize that it can something huge for me that I noticed after doing ERP for a couple months. I was able to focus so much better. It was like a switch was just flipped in my brain. And I was like, I'm like really able to sit down and do a thing without constant distraction.
[00:38:43] Sam Temple: And I think it was just me being at a point where the volume on my entries of thoughts was so low that they weren't distracting me. And I wasn't constantly being pulled away. Like, I won't be just working on something and they're like, Hey, uh, have you thought about your collapsed lung today? And I'm like, what?
[00:39:03] Sam Temple: Oh my God. Now I have to go Google that. So it was just after all of the little thoughts floating around in my head started to lessen. I was like, wow, I can actually complete a task.
[00:39:16] Erin H. Davis: Right. Oh, that's so amazing. Yeah. So you are noticing results like starting to watch a TV show and enjoy it. You're able to get more things done.
[00:39:28] Erin H. Davis: You're focusing better. It sounds like there have been some benefits to your relationships as well. Can you tell me more about how treatment has helped you in your relationships?
[00:39:41] Sam Temple: It just has made me able to show up for people. In ways that I couldn't before. And that's really important to me. I am someone who really values helping people through anything.
[00:39:55] Sam Temple: I prior to doing treatment, I couldn't really be there for my friends and [00:40:00] family, like I wanted to be because I was so consumed and just never had the capacity because of what was going on in my own brain. But to be in a place now where my friends can come to me for advice or tell me how they're feeling and I can take that load on and I, if I can take a little bit of the load off of some of my friends and family, I'm like, wow, I'm so happy that I can show up for these people now because before it was just, I couldn't do it.
[00:40:27] Erin H. Davis: Oh, right. It probably felt like another thing to put you over the edge. Right. Yeah. Yeah. Because OCD can be all consuming and there's. It's almost like you can mount a quarter off yourself because everything just feels like so much.
[00:40:45] Sam Temple: Yeah.
[00:40:45] Erin H. Davis: Well, Sam, it sounds like you have experienced a lot of great things and a lot of results.
[00:40:51] Erin H. Davis: What have been some other positives in your life now since you have been to NoCD?
[00:40:59] Sam Temple: Something huge for me is that prior to treatment, I was extremely scared to fly. I would not get on a plane. I have this, uh, I also wouldn't really want to be a passenger in a car, any like moving form of transportation where I was not piloting it, I was not driving the car.
[00:41:18] Sam Temple: I was not flying the plane. I wouldn't do it because that uncertainty and that sense of not being in control was so overwhelming. But now that I. Have been going through treatment and doing exposures surrounding these things. I'm not from LA and I live in LA now, all my family and loved ones and people that I care about are in Georgia.
[00:41:39] Sam Temple: So I'm able to go see my family now, which is like,
[00:41:44] Erin H. Davis: so
[00:41:44] Sam Temple: huge for me. Like I'm able to fly and it doesn't feel so crushing like it did before. So that that's one just massive thing that I'm able to just be there for my family and see my family and. That it means the world to me that I can do that. Now it's so rewarding.
[00:42:02] Sam Temple: Like, like no CD has given me that, which is so cool.
[00:42:06] Erin H. Davis: That is awesome. And I'm sure that is really special that you can go and see your family. And what do you think would have happened if you. Had not gone to treatment. You're living in LA families in Georgia. You haven't had treatment. What then?
[00:42:22] Sam Temple: I think I would have just been in the same position where it's like, I haven't, it, at one point it had been over a year and a [00:42:30] half since I had seen my family because I would make plans to get on a plane.
[00:42:35] Sam Temple: I would go to the airport. I would freak out and I would go home. I did that like five times.
[00:42:40] Erin H. Davis: Wow. So
[00:42:41] Sam Temple: I feel like I would still just be in that loop with not flying and freaking out and having panic attacks at the airport and then going home. I think I'd still be doing that if I didn't get treatment.
[00:42:52] Erin H. Davis: Yeah. Yeah. That's awesome. So it sounds like, I mean, you're really starting to live your life now.
[00:43:01] Sam Temple: I am. Yeah. And it feels so good. It's um, it's like a, it's just, it's so cool. It's so cool and like I said earlier, feeling good feels good and I want everyone to feel good.
[00:43:15] Erin H. Davis: Yes. Well, thank you again so much for your time today.
[00:43:19] Erin H. Davis: I really appreciate you talking to the listeners and helping, you know, anyone who's struggling out there know that they're not alone. And if you're feeling like you're too far gone, that's likely an intrusive thought because OCD is a trickster and that's not true.
[00:43:36] Sam Temple: Yeah, it's not true. There is help exists for everyone, and we can all feel good.
[00:43:42] Erin H. Davis: We're partnering with NoCD to raise awareness about OCD. OCD is more than what you see on TV and in the movies. Imagine having unwanted thoughts about your relationship stuck in your head all day, no matter how hard you try to make them go away. That's Relationship OCD. It comes with unrelenting interest of images, thoughts, and feelings.
[00:44:03] Erin H. Davis: And urges about your partner or loved one. Breaking the OCD cycle takes effective treatment. Go to n ocd.com to get evidence-based treatment,
[00:44:17] Erin H. Davis: do you have any closing thoughts or recommendations for the listeners?
[00:44:23] Sam Temple: Like you said, you are absolutely not alone. Even if you feel like you are beyond help, you absolutely are not. I can't stress enough how much I was in a place before where I did not believe in myself. And I have made a total 180 and You can too, if you're struggling with that, all it takes is one first step.
[00:44:43] Sam Temple: You are putting yourself so far ahead. If you just take that first step,
[00:44:47] Erin H. Davis: love it, love it. And so that first step, just to be clear, I mean, that's scheduling a free consult with no CD.
[00:44:55] Sam Temple: Yes, 100%. Yes. Take, take that first step [00:45:00] and schedule a free 15 minute call with no CD.
[00:45:04] Erin H. Davis: Yeah, because it's not going to hurt to, even like you were saying earlier, just to talk to them and see like, is this OCD or what's going on?
[00:45:12] Erin H. Davis: Because from your experience, like they can point you in the right direction.
[00:45:17] Sam Temple: Right, right. They absolutely pointed me in the right direction. So yes, even if you don't feel like you have OCD, no CD can help you to understand what's going on.
[00:45:28] Erin H. Davis: Wonderful. All right. What a great time it was in talking with Sam.
[00:45:35] Erin H. Davis: I encourage you to check out the links in the show notes. If you want to learn more about Sam and follow her stories on Instagram or see what she's up to on the H3 Podcast on YouTube. And come back next week for another episode of Bossing Up, Overcoming OCD, where I'm going to be talking about 10 myths about OCD.
[00:45:56] Erin H. Davis: Thanks y'all. Take care. Thank you for listening to another episode of Bossing Up, Overcoming OCD. This information is intended to be helpful and not a substitute for advice. Transcripts provided by Transcription Outsourcing, LLC. For handpicked recommendations that can brighten your day. Your support through these links helps keep the show running and provide valuable content.
[00:46:34] Erin H. Davis: You're not alone in your journey. Stay strong, stay resilient and keep bossing up. See you next time.
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