Feeling Stuck In Relationships
Have you ever questioned whether you’re truly in love or simply afraid of change? It’s a common experience, and in this episode, I talk about the doubts that often arise in relationships, especially during major transitions or decisions.
I hope you’ll learn why these thoughts are a normal part of relationships and how they don’t always indicate a deeper issue. I’ll share actionable strategies to shift uncertainty into clarity by reconnecting with your personal goals and appreciating the positive aspects of your connection.
Plus, I’ll introduce my Obsess Less, Love More program, which provides the tools and support you need to overcome relationship anxiety and build a more confident, fulfilling love life.
00:00 Introduction: Overthinking Your Relationship
00:45 Understanding Relationship Doubts
02:43 Feeling Stuck in a Relationship
03:56 Strategies to Overcome Relationship Doubts
04:43 Reconnecting with Your Needs
06:48 Evaluating Your Relationship Positively
07:52 Conclusion and Next Episode Preview
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Erin H. Davis: [00:00:00] Have you ever found yourself overthinking your relationship, wondering like, am I really in love or am I just afraid of change? This is a super common experience and even comes up with my clients all the time. In fact, a lot of my clients come to me saying, I want to change my relationships. I want to feel More connected with the people I love.
So while it's common to second guess your love and your feelings This is due to doubts and not deeper issues. All too often Experts will think it's this deep psychological Trauma or subconscious thinking like we're still in the Freudian era and I'm here to tell you that's not true It's not that complicated.
It's actually quite simple. In today's episode, we're breaking down the difference between these relationship doubts of am I really in love or am I just afraid of change and talking about how you can know if you're really in love. So welcome to the bossing up overcoming OCD podcast show. I'm your host, Erin Davis.
I'm an OCD therapist and relationship coach on all things in helping you have a more fulfilling life. More specifically, Transcribed Relationships, because we are all humans and we are designed for relationships. The pandemic definitely proved that. So in this episode, you're going to learn how to spot these doubts, understand where they're coming from, and gain tools to move forward confidently in your relationship.
Don't forget to subscribe to the show, leave a review. And if you're watching on YouTube, give me a thumbs up. In this feeling of Am I really in love or am I just afraid of change? I totally get it because everyone experiences some doubts in their relationships from time to time, especially during transitions of like moving in together or getting engaged, having kids or making some type of big decision.
And if we're being real, it's actually a healthy thing that you are assessing where you are in the relationship. Okay. So if you find yourself in this position of Am I really in love or am I just afraid of change? I encourage you to pause and ask yourself, is this doubt really about my relationship or is it something happening in my own life?
Oftentimes doubt comes from things happening in the universe around you and not necessarily from your relationship itself. So again, while some people out there will make it so complicated and trying to understand your relationship or understanding your stress and having all of these complicated steps, it doesn't have to be complicated.
It can actually be quite simple. So when I think of feeling stuck in a relationship, I mean, really that could go all sorts of ways, but I'm thinking like maybe you're feeling stuck. Financially, because maybe you want to leave, but you feel like your partner has all the money. I don't know. Maybe we want to consider financial independence, if that's the case.
Or maybe you're feeling stuck because you're afraid that you won't find someone better. A lot of people may feel stuck in a relationship because of kids. Way people often feel stuck in a relationship is because of guilt or obligation. Like they are afraid of hurting their partner. Another one is the fear of being alone.
So all in all, there are lots of ways that you could feel stuck in a relationship. Let's break it down to help you feel unstuck without having to make it so complicated or life altering like ruins or explodes your relationship. So here's what happens in those situations. When we start to feel stuck, it can feel suffocating and like you're trapped or there's no way out.
There's no option. And that feels so limiting, especially in our life today where really like the abundance mindset, the growth mindset is so freeing. Okay. So in that doubt that what if question, when it comes up of what if I'm not in love, What if I'm afraid of change? Let's really look at that and call it for what it is.
It is a relationship doubt and that doubt is not serving you. And the first step here is to change these what if thoughts to a positive affirmation and you're going to change it to like a manifestation that helps serve your energy, serve your relationship. Like, for example, instead of saying, I'm afraid of change.
You can say, I embrace change as an opportunity to grow and create something even better. You have the power within you to change your mindset, to change how you think about things. And you can totally start doing this step today. Another strategy, let's reconnect with you. Let's connect with your needs.
Okay? Maybe something is dull or boring or just at A law in your relationship, you didn't find yourself here [00:05:00] overnight, like this has been a small, consistent pattern happening over a period of time. And sometimes people can feel stuck in their relationships because they've lost touch with their own needs and desires.
So here's. for you. I want you to get out a notebook and maybe some fancy pens, and I want you to write down your own goals, your dreams, your values. And if you're struggling to think on those things, check out my relationship confidence course and it's going to be listed on my website at livebeyonddoubt.
com. It's at a super special price right now. So definitely check that out. And it's got some journal prompts, goal setting, pretty much everything. Values assessment, all the things to help you with your relationship and feeling confident in that relationship. Then once you figured out those goals and hobbies, do the things when we are in alignment with our values.
Everything feels so much better. So take, for example, that you want to travel to New York. Okay. Let's pretend that you've been feeling bored and you really love New York because you have a value of traveling. All right. Just because you haven't been traveling doesn't mean New York isn't there. Okay. So let's say in your relationship, even if you value love, it doesn't mean that it's not there.
Okay. Okay, you just have to find it. So back to our journey to New York, you are going to hop in your car and take that route up to New York. Now, I'm coming from North Carolina. So let's say I don't use my GPS, but I make a wrong turn. It doesn't mean New York is not there. It just means I need to reroute and get back on track.
Okay. Same thing can happen in your relationship. So do the things that you value and you will be surprised at how well this works for you. Evaluating your relationship for the things that are going well. Too often we can have this false narrative going on and I've been guilty of this too. So don't get me wrong when I tell you this, false narratives are like poison for your relationship because you are feeding your mind all of these negative Nelly things that aren't even real.
Okay. And it's very toxic for your relationship. So I want you to shift out of that, evaluate the relationship from really like a zooming out kind of perspective and write down the positive things about your relationship. Now I'm not saying about your partner. Okay. Write about your relationship. Imagine your relationship as if it's its own thing.
It's its own person. What's good about it? Does it bring joy to the world? Does it bring joy to your life? Does it help you become a better person? Does it challenge you? Does it help you grow? Be humble. Does it help you put others before yourself? So while this is a short list of helping you, if you're feeling stuck in a relationship, know that there is more support available.
Go to my website at live beyond doubt. com as I am launching a group coaching program, all designed to help you feel more confident in your relationship and to stop having these doubts ruin the show for you. So no matter where you are on your relationship journey, take Action today. Thanks for being here and come back next week where I'm going to be talking about, am I too much or not enough?
Finding that balance between space and connection. See ya.
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*This podcast is for informational and educational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional medical or mental health advice, diagnosis, or treatment.
